This is it. My application to use my superannuation to pay for weight loss surgery has been approved and the money to pay for the surgery is guaranteed.
In just a few days I have to start my pre-operation diet whose goal, I’m told, is to shrink my liver and reduce the chance of it being damaged during the surgery.
Yesterday I went to the chemist and bought some Degas because the people on the weight loss surgery Facebook group said it helps reduce post operative pain. I also bought three boxes of Optifast shakes and two boxes of Optifast diet bars which is a third of what I’ll need since I’m supposed to have three per day for 42 days.
I’m considering being a cheapskate and having just one a day for six weeks but that probably won’t be do-able.
My biggest fear is diarrhoea!
Two days after having the gastroscopy I got the worst case of diarrhoea that I have ever had in my entire life. Every time I have ever had diarrhoea before there has been some warning. A tummy cramp or grumble and a sudden sensation in the bowel that sends you running. You don’t have long when the warning comes but you do get a warning.
Not this time. These episodes were so sudden there was no warning at all – none! I’m talking diarrhoea so bad, so fast, so explosive I had to mop the floor and clean the toilet and toilet walls after it. I was at home during the three days it lasted so I was lucky. I only had to wash nighties, sheets, and the undies I started wearing in an effort to reduce the amount of floor washing I had to do.
It was so out of control I am traumatized!
I think it was a reaction to the anaesthetic and I’m terrified it will happen again after the surgery. People on the Facebook group who have had the surgery keep asking “When will I be able to trust a fart again?”
That tells me I’m in for some bowel leakage even without being allergic to the anaesthetic so I bought a packet of incontinence undies! I hope and pray I won’t need them but I’m going to wear them until I’m sure I don’t need to!
That’s how traumatic that last episode was! If it happens again like that I have zero hope of being able to get to the toilet fast enough so old lady diapers are my only chance of reducing the mess.
TMI? Sorry-not-sorry! I keep looking for a sign from God that I don’t have to do this!
My superannuation should not have been released. The tax office says they won’t OK the use of your superannuation savings if you have other savings you could use. I have savings and the tax office know that since they pre-fill the amount of interest I get from my savings when I do my tax return. I put the application in with a prayer that it would not be approved if it was not God’s will for me to have the surgery.
I was stacking the deck.
I expected the application to fail but it meant I could be sure it was God’s will if it didn’t fail and, to my astonishment, it didn’t fail. Everything came together and even Covid-19 doesn’t seem to be able to prevent it. They have told me to have a Covid-19 test 72 hours before surgery and self-isolate from the time of the test until admission for the surgery.
It’s going to happen.
In just a few days I will have to say goodbye to my addiction to food and I wonder what outlet I will find for my addiction then. I quit smoking and replaced it with additional eating.
They warn you that you might replace your food addiction with other addictions like alcohol or that you will not be able to stop eating and you will undo the surgery benefits in time and put the weight back on.
I believe this is God’s will for me so I am going to trust He will help me get through this without making things worse for myself.
Maybe I should consider buying a dummy or sucking my thumb?
I guess I can worry about it later.
I have six weeks of dieting to get through first and it’s going to be brutal!
If you are a believer – I’d appreciate it if you’d pray for me.